- Retrieve exams from car. Notice that elves have not magically been working on them.
- Curse elves.
- Set finals on desk, table, or other workspace. Notice that the surrounding area needs cleaning. Do that first.
- Fix a snack and put a movie in the DVD player to watch while you work on marking papers.
- Read one paper. Resist urge to commit Hari Kari over poor work.
- Take a break.
- Call a friend. Perhaps s/he would like to help you read? Listen to sound of hysterical laughter.
- Curse friend.
- Try looking at another paper or two. That's a big stack, isn't it? Wonder aloud why you aren't one of those scan-tron teachers.
- Curse self.
- Start the laundry. Work on paying the bills.
- Read a few more papers.
- Take a nap. You've earned it after working so hard.
- Decide to get serious. Grading this is akin to band-aid removal: the faster you make it happen, the sooner the pain will subside.
- Speaking of painkiller, get a glass of nice red wine as attitude adjustment.
- Mark several more papers.
- Refill wine glass.
- Repeat steps 16 and 17 as often as necessary to finish grading final exams. This part of the list will move quickly.
- The next morning, curse hangover.
03 February 2008
How to Grade Finals
In case any of you readers are new or soon-to-be teachers, I thought I'd post this handy guide to grading final exams.